Calling People Forth2

as I said a few moments ago we're
picking up this morning where we left
off last week and last week we looked at
two of three principles that Paul spells
out here in 1 Thessalonians chapter 2
that we need to understand not only but
also embrace if we're going to become
all that God invites us to be quick
review the first is we need both a
father and a mother if we are going to
become fully mature in Christ Paul puts
it this way versus six and seven as
apostles of Christ we could have been a
burden to you but we were gentle among
you like a mother caring for her little
children and then later on verse 11 and
verse 12 for you know that we dealt with
each of you as a father deals with his
own children encouraging comforting and
urging you to live lives worthy of God
who calls you into his kingdom and glory
we saw last week that a mother to the
degree to which she embraces the
feminine the feminine principles of
communion and integration provides a
safety and an environment in which a
child or an individual can be nurtured
to find the stability in the security
from which that child or that grown-up
can eventually do live and a father to
the degree to which the father embraces
the masculine principle of separation
and differentiation calls the child
forth enables the child to know what his
or her
values are and empowers them to stand on
those values over against all the
conflicting values all the way around a
child needs a mother's influence as well
as a father's influence that's why
historically cultures around the world
have had coming-of-age ceremonies for
young boys think of the Jewish notion of
the Bar Mitzvah in my father's day you
became a man when you finished school at
grade six at the age of twelve and you
joined the workforce and one of the
areas of confusion in today's world and
one of the reasons we have this
undefined drawn-out teenage years is
because mostly in Western culture we
don't have clearly defined coming-of-age
ceremonies and so we make them up as we
go along for some it's getting their
drivers license at the age of 16 for
some of us for some it's being allowed
to go to the liquor store to the bar and
get your own liquor and for some man who
it is defined by your first sexual
experience or things of that nature and
then we wonder why there is such
confusion in today's society about what
it is to be man or what it is to be a
woman both spiritually it in the natural
we need the influence of the feminine we
need the influence of the masculine and
then Paul we saw defines the masculine
in this passage with three words the
words are encouraging comforting and
urging for you know that we dealt with
each of you as a father deals with his
own children encouraging comforting and
urging you to live lives worthy of God
who calls you into his kingdom and glory
and if it's a mother's job to embrace a
child
would make for a safety zone and to meet
the deepest needs of security in that
child's life then the job of a father is
to challenge the child out of there to
enable the child to stand and that means
encouraging him to be all that he can be
it means comforting him or her when a
trouble or failure has overtaken despite
the best efforts and of course urging in
the sense of listen this isn't about
your comfort this isn't about your
security this is about the kingdom of
God and the well-being of other people
we need the masculine and the feminine
the feminine protects and shelters and
comforts in a motherly fashion the
masculine draws us out and challenges us
to become all that we can be and that
brings us this morning then to a third
principle that Paul talks about I
introduced it very briefly last week
asked you to do your homework and of
course you all did that this process
must be bathed it must be bathed in
selfless sacrificial love listen again
to how this is worded in this particular
scripture passage as apostles of Christ
we could have been a burden to you but
we were gentle among you like a mother
caring for her little children we loved
you so much that we were delighted to
share with you not only the gospel of
God but our lives as well because you
had become so dear to us surely you
remember brothers our toil and hardship
we work night and day in order not to be
a burden to anyone while we preach the
gospel of God to you you are with
this is and so is god of how holy
righteous and blameless we were among
you who believed now if you did your
homework which of course you did you
will have identified five active words
that describe Paul's relationship with
this church at Thessalonica you will
recall he led these people to the Lord
in Thessalonica which is in Greece on
his second missionary journey let me
walk you through the words that he uses
in this particular passage because it's
really interesting the first thing he
says is we were gentle among you like a
mother with her little children you
don't normally think of the Apostle Paul
as a gentle man do you I mean he's Lee
he's that he's tough he's tough because
you don't go through what he has gone
through without being that but he's also
got the gentleness usually associated
with a mother then he says we loved you
we loved you so much that we were
delighted to share with you not only the
gospel of God but our lives as well
fascinating glimpse into the heart of
the Apostle Paul in terms of his
relationship with the church these were
in just mission objects these were and
just you know scalps to hang on his belt
no these were people that he loved
intensely identified himself with then
he goes on to say we were delighted to
share with you not only the gospel of
God but our lives as well he allowed
himself to develop relationships that
were deeply rooted in the heart then he
goes on to say I don't in any way ever
want to be a burden to you you remember
our toil and hardship we work night and
day in order not to be a bird
to any one of you read Paul's writings
to the churches he always goes out of
his way to demonstrate that he doesn't
ever want anybody to be able to accuse
him of taking from them and if you want
to read about that the closing chapters
of 2nd Corinthians really talks about
how he addresses those charges because
people are always accusing God's people
of well you're just in it for the money
or you're just in it for what you can
get out of me Paul says I work night and
day so that none of you could ever say i
was taking advantage of you then he goes
on to say that he was holy and righteous
and blameless that is to say he lived
before them with absolute integrity role
these all together and you get a picture
of the selfless love that he
demonstrated in being both a mother and
a father to the people of thessalonica
and right here you have the first of two
very significant principles that we need
to keep in mind in any parent child
relationship in any mentoring kind of
relationship and the first principle is
this a minty that is the receiver of the
mentoring a child if you will or the
person who is being helped has to be
teachable that is to say if you're going
to learn anything from somebody who is
serving as a spiritual father or a
spiritual mother as well as a natural
father or a natural
mother you have to be teachable you have
to be willing to learn sounds simple
enough but an actual reality is rather
difficult and i'll tell you why most of
us spend x numbers of years trying to
prove to ourselves until the rest of the
world that were grown up don't we and
when we're growing up we have our own
ideas that we have our own thoughts and
to lay those aside and to receive
somebody else's word for it when
sometimes we don't understand it or
experience it for ourselves is extremely
difficult witness any parent trying to
tell his teenage son or his teenage
daughter about what is acceptable
behavior or what is not question for you
this morning how many here remember ever
seeing the karate kid movie series
anybody here a number of you Roberta
first called my attention to this but in
Karate Kid 1 which goes back to nineteen
eighty-four which kind of dates all of
us a little bit there is a fascinating
interchange between Daniel Larusso and
mr. Miyagi let me tell you the back
story and then I'll show you the clip if
you know the movie at Daniel and his
single parent mom moved from New Jersey
to California because that's where her
new job was Daniel didn't want to move
at a difficult time at climate izing
himself to the California surf crowd and
got into a lot of trouble particularly
with a number of young men who are all
part of a karate club called Cobra Kai
the fact of course that he took up with
the ex girlfriend of one other leaders
didn't help that relationship so they
tended to beat the snot out of him and
and he wanted to learn how to fight back
and
discovered mr. Miyagi who was the the
gardener the handyman in the apartment
complex where he lived was a karate
expert so he asked him to teach him
karate which he agreed to do but it
involved getting young daniel to do a
number of things that he did not
appreciate or understand or could see
the relationship with karate and that's
what shows up in this little clip let's
roll it take a look at it it's really
good clip isn't it and doesn't that
capture the challenge of mentoring or
parenting and that's hard enough with
normal quote unquote people because we
rebel against being taught it's even
more difficult if we're broken or
wounded because a broken or a wounded
person's perspective on life is
distorted and twisted for example if you
are the kind of person who has a spirit
of rejection then you will pick up
rejection in all kinds of places even
where you're not being rejected a lot of
us will have experienced that for
example somebody thinks you're mad at
them or somebody takes offense when you
had meant no offense and it's like
walking on eggshells around people all
the time because their perceptions of
life are distorted if you have somebody
who had major issues with authority when
they were little and you come along and
you try to speak into their lives their
defenses go up just like that and for
that person to get better or to grow up
he or she and this is where it's very
difficult hastily aside his or her own
perceptions of reality and they have to
buy into your version of reality and if
you've ever tried that that's incredibly
difficult because now you cannot trust
your own experience that makes you feel
like a baby it makes you feel very
dependent on other people and you will
have a lot of people around you telling
you that you're in absolute
it to give your life into the hands of
somebody who is like who knows better
than you and yet that's what needs to be
done if you want to grow up the mentee
has to be prepared to submit to the
mentor which is why Jesus puts it this
way of course in Matthew chapter 18
verse 32 go back and find that verse
it's not there I tell you the truth
unless you become like little children
you will never enter the kingdom of
heaven what makes a little child a
little child it's a willingness to learn
from the adult and Jesus says if we want
to get somewhere in life we have to be
like little children not in the sense of
being child dish there's lots of that to
go around but childlike in the sense
that we're willing to submit and we're
willing to learn well that's the first
principle of mentoring that we need to
keep in mind the minty daniel has to
submit to mr. Miyagi if he's going to
learn the fine art of karate but the
second part is what we're talking about
here and that is just as important and
that is the mentor must have selfless or
sacrificial love we loved you so much
that we were delighted to share with you
not only the gospel of God but our lives
as well because you had become so dear
to us you had become so dear to us and
love here isn't just you know a nice
feeling no no
is putting the interest of the other
person ahead of yourself it encompasses
all the terms the Apostle Paul is using
when he talks about being gentle among
them and loving them sharing his life
with them he doesn't want to be a burden
to them and he models absolute integrity
and I'll tell you that's easier said
than done because if you've ever
parented a child and a lot of you have
or have you ever try to walk with
somebody through their life's dirty then
you will know how difficult and painful
that is and how readily and easily your
love is thrown back into your face you
go out of your way and you share your
time talent and treasure with somebody
and they walk away from you not only
will they walk away from you but they
blacken your name because their feelings
have been hurt and they distort the
nature of the relationship and and you
find yourself in situations where your
heart breaks because you're
misrepresented and you're treated
sometimes like dirt how many parents
haven't felt that way when they have
been in conflict with an ungrateful
child and how many of us haven't felt
that way whether with employees or
somebody else that we're trying to walk
with and the very human temptation then
is to lash out and get even and break
off the relationship now that clip that
I just showed you I cut out a whole
bunch of very foul language because
young daniel after having spent four
days washing cars polishing our painting
the fence and painting the house and
sending the deck is absolutely fed up
and he thinks he's just being taken
advantage of and he wants to walk away
because this is not what he bargained
for and mr. Miyagi has to hold him
accountable and take him to task because
that's the only way that he's going to
learn how to do karate and so it takes
the grace of Jesus in your life at in my
life too late ourselves down like this
to repeatedly step back into a situation
and to continue that covenant
relationship that we have established in
order to bless the other person it has
to be about their well-being not my
frustration do you understand what I'm
saying there do you know how difficult
that can be because everything inside
you says you treat me that way if you're
going to be that kind of an ungrateful
person then well you know stick it
you're just not going to get my time my
love and my attention and so that
doesn't mean we have to be perfect as
people who walk with people but it does
mean that we have to be authentic and we
have to be transparent we have to hold
ourselves to the same standard that
we're expecting our children our
students or our mentees so that they can
see modeled in our lives what it's like
to be a follower of Jesus and as we do
that we have the satisfaction and the
joy of watching the person that we have
mentored rise to the occasion and become
equipped in
word in the calling out that we have
been doing for them and so here is the
final clip out of karate kid to where
our karate kid one where Daniel enters
into a competition with Johnny Lawrence
Johnny Lawrence used to be boyfriend to
Ali who now is girlfriend to Daniel
earlier on in this competition one of
the Cobras has already injured Daniel's
need to try to get him to withdraw out
of the competition and here is the fight
that takes place that's a bit violent
even for karate but you'll you catch the
flavor of what it is that we're talking
perverted I'm going to ask you to come
up here I know we hadn't planned to do
this but it so happens last night
that in itself is a fascinating story to
tell so I'm going to ask her to just
describe that process because he made
her do things years and years ago that
she wasn't too wild about last night i
went to a concert with the leonard koi
and Andre Neville I haven't been to what
I've never been to one I thought that
because he was playing I'd like to go so
Andre Neville was my organ teacher i
started with him when i was 11 and I was
with him for about four years and have
not seen him since and we've sort of
parted our ways and that's where we left
off and so last night I thought I'm
going to connect with him and it was it
was quite a quite a moment actually for
both of us he was not aware at all of my
journey in life and where I am today and
I think he was just so incredibly
overjoyed and overwhelmed with just the
thought that I had pursued music and he
was just it was just for him it was just
an all thing you know it's like I taught
this person and here she is and you
don't get very many students like that
who they just maybe take lessons for
maybe a few years and then they quit and
so the fact that I am doing what I'm
doing has a lot to do with him in many
ways because just like Daniel who had to
wax and I mean I had to do a lot of
playing and practicing but he made me
play hymns all the time that was it and
you know I I wasn't always allowed to
play the glorious Bakken
you know boots dude and all those
wonderful glorious organ pieces but I
had to master the hymns and that's what
I did all through you know four or five
years I played and I played and I played
and I practiced and I practiced hymns
and that was it and I think I would not
be here today if it were not for that
and he had a big role in not and so I
was able to share that with him last
night and his eyes were just beaming and
sparkling and he was full of this joy
and pride and I I was just really it was
just really a neat moment so so for both
I trust you know this if you don't you
need to but Roberta is an incredibly
she has multiple times lay that all on
the altar so that she can serve the Lord
and serve Christian community with the
gifting that the Lord has entrusted to
her and I think that's an incredible
model that in turn gets repeated in
other generations as she has taught
people music and worship leading even as
she's doing so mentoring today in that
capacity to questions for you as we wind
up this morning number one as you look
over your life who has there been that
God has used to speak into your life and
call you forth father mother brother
sister teacher employer somebody in
spiritual leadership somebody who saw
you who saw your potential and who
reached into your life and who came
alongside you and said you can do this
and who has rejoiced with genuine joy in
the places of your life where you have
succeeded give that some thought then
ask yourself have I ever thought of
thinking that person for their
investment in my life if you haven't
this might be a good time to do that
because just like Roberta's mentor had
no idea of the trajectory of her life
the chances are those who have
influenced you may not even know in what
powerful ways that God has used them in
your life I know that I have been mentor
to from a distance by people who don't
even know that I exist and yet whose
ministries have profoundly influenced me
and have contributed to Who I am today
so the first question is who was there
in your life that God used to bless you
and call you forth then secondly who is
there in
your world now that God might invite you
to step in to identify their giftings
and their callings and call them forth
one of our interns technically speaking
right now is damn bottle on and Roberta
is spending time with him every week
calling him forth into his sense of
calling in the areas of worship ministry
who is there in your life doesn't mean
it has to be spiritual it can be but
what gift has God given you what
resources has God given you that you can
invest in somebody else's life so that
they can stand up one day and be
everything that God is calling them to
be you see generationally that is how
the church imparts life and vision and
passion to the next generation and if
you and I don't do it and if you and I
don't do it deliberately the world will
because it will mold our offspring and
are young into their image and into
their likeness and if ever there was a
time when we need young men and young
women boys and girls who know who they
are and know what their identity is in
christ and who can stand up and be
counted for Jesus it is today and the
job rests on your shoulders and my
shoulders to try to make that happen so
who is there that you can enter into
covenant with to find the terms of the
relationship and do your part in calling
people into maturity in Christ not only
will that benefit them but it will
benefit you and it will indeed benefit
you